Episode 4
Сардэчна запрашаем у Беларусь!
Amsterdam, The NetherlandsAfter eating the sheep, we tried to find a hotel, when, on the road, Trintje Oosterhuis appeared in our sight.
She said she was attracted by the smell of the roasted sheep and asked for a piece of meat. Sadly, only bones remained.
A bit disappointed, she listened to us when we said we were here to bring her to Vienna.
Trintje Oosterhuis - Yes I know! Anouk told me so!
ESCIliasMANL (Inactive) - Grmblm... Anouk...
Trintje Oosterhuis - But don't stay outside! You're going to have a cold! Follow me!
We listened to her and followed the Dutch lady to a big house.
Trintje Oosterhuis - You are going to live here until we know where to go next! And because we're not far from Christmas, I have a little present for you!
We were very excited and couldn't wait for such a magical and commercial event!
Our stay in Amsterdam was enjoyable, except for the weather : the Dutch wind is so cold that
George froze on the spot.
We were always outside, walked along (huhu) the streets and the Christmas markets to buy expensive presents and cakes that, at every bite, makes you fatten a bit more. Christmas is magical.
On the D-Day, Trintje had set a huge table with traditional Christmas dishes such as turkeys stuffed with chicken stuffed with quails stuffed with chicks stuffed with peas.
When we were all sat, except
George, who still had not melt down, somebody knocked on the door. Trintje opened to allow us to see our late guest.
Oh! Look! It's Carola!
- Carola?
alex(a)bg - Oh no! It's Carola!
Trintje Oosterhuis - Carola? What are you doing here?
Carola - Who could imagine a Christmas without Carola?
alex(a)bg - Me!
Valentin O'Brien - Yeah me too!
αndreas - Who is Carola?
Carola looked at
αndreas with evil eyes and answered with an ironic voice :
Carola - You don't know the queen of Sweden? Good! Then we are going to play my songs all night long!
Everybody - Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Liev - Yes!
We spent a good night indeed, and when midnight rang, Trintje gave us our present.
It was small and packed in newspapers. No need to say we were disappointed.
Christian NO (inactive) unpacked it, made a sad face and gave it to
Matt, who discovered with happiness what it was.
Matt - "1001 Esma Redžepova facts"! Amazing! Thank you Trintje!
Trintje Oosterhuis - You're welcome! I knew everybody here would love it!
@douzepointa - Yeah... Sure...
Fact #274 : Esma is more popular than Ariana Grande
Breaking the unshared happy mood,
Laimis came in the room like a wreaking ball and shouted :
Laimis - Hurry!
George has melted down!
Apostolis - So it's a good news!
Laimis - No! He's very sick! He needs a doctor!
Apostolis - A doctor? On Christmas night?
Laimis - Anyone here knows a good doctor?
Jasmin - I still have my firt aid kit if you want!
Laimis - It will never be enough! He needs a true doctor!
Carola - Hey! It was a Dutch surgeon who managed to make me look 30 years ounger than I am!
alex(a)bg - How old are you?
Carola - 76!
Carola called him, and 30 minutes later, he was in
George 's bed.
The doctor - He has a cold!
Carola - Impossible! Can you do something to my boobs? I feel they are not huge enough!
The doctor - Mrs Carola! I tried Anything : silicone, rubber, butter, metal... Isn't it too much?
Laimis - What if we talked about
George?
The doctor - Oh! Yes! Sorry! I give you these pills! He has to eat one three times a day : breakfast, lunch and dinner!
Laimis - Thank you!
The doctor - It will cost 150€
nick - How much does it make in freedom money?
The doctor - 183$!
𝖋𝖑𝖔𝖗𝖎𝖆𝖓 - 150€? It's more than the Greek GDP! He will never be able to pay!
Vaios - Stop with those jokes please!
𝖋𝖑𝖔𝖗𝖎𝖆𝖓 - Pay your bills!
Yeah! Pay your *hips* debts!
We all went to sleep, because the next day we had to leave Amsterdam.
We woke up and Carola had disappeared, I guess it was our true Christmas present.
When everyone was awake, I put a huge Europe map on the big table we used yesterday and showed our next destination : Belarus.
Aless - So this time you'll go to Belarus on time?
Franck - Listen, last year I chose not to go to Belarus when Teo had won Eurofest because I was sure they would change the song and they didn't! If this year we're on time and they change the song, I swear I burn someone!
Aless - You are sure of that?
Franck - As sure as I am when I say that Maimuna will never try to be in Eurovision!
Tias - Oh! By the way I have the list of the candidates for EuroFest. There is Maimuna.
Jess - Maimuna omggggggslkfjsafjalkg
Tias - Are you ok?
Jess - Zbgl
Mordecai smacked her and she came back to normal. Then, we packed our suitcases and climbed in the bus with our newcommer Trintje.
We managed to cross Germany without Melanie Müller in background, which is a miracle, and Poland without our Polish member
𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐋 singing My słowianie. We didn't know if it was a miracle because he never sang it in front of us. In fact, except some "kurwas" when we face a problem or meat an attractive girl, he is rather silent.
of kurwas
To enter Belarus, we had to promise that we loved Lukashenko and Putin. It was hard for us to do so after what happened last year in Moscow with Ruslana but we had to... And
Jess wanted to see Maimuna so bad!
Belarus is full of forests, but when we escaped that green desert, we finished in the center of Minsk. As usual, on time to watch EuroFest. We took the best seats and waited for the show to start,
Jess holding a flag of Belarus with with a picture of Maimuna pasted on it.
After a show horrible for everybody, except for
Jan who said it was the best EuroFest ever, Belarus showed what they think of democracy and let the televote be only 1/8 of the final vote.
In the hour of interval acts, half of us left.
Blandine had bought bottles of vodka so we drank to forget.
When Uzari and Maimuna won,
Jess screamed a horrible noise and ran to the stage to kiss Maimuna.
Jess - Your song sucks but you are amazing!
Uzari - Don't wait for an answer she only talks with her violin.
Maimuna - *plays violin*
Uzari - She said thank you for supporting her.
Jess - You understand what she says with... her violin?
Maimuna - *plays violin*
Uzari - She said "of course dumbass how do you think I communicate".
Jess - I love her.
Uzari - Me too.
