Episode 20
Bine aศi venit รฎn Moldova!
Helsinki, Finland The band Pertti Kurikan Nimipรคivรคt, who we will be calling PKN for obvious reasons, greeted us Finnish way, throwing empty bottles of vodka on us.
linux620 told us not to fear it because this kind of things is normal in Finland. Nobody however enjoyed this custom, except @fizzyfrost, who managed to find a bottle that was not totaly empty and to drink the rest.
@fizzyfrost - It's better than this Irish whiskey.
Molly Sterling -
O man of the levant, your voice is a branch that falls on the family of birds that is my soul.Matt - She's very touched by what you said.
Running out of bottles, PKN came over us and said "Haloo". Still apprehensive, we prudently got nearer them. We had a good reason to fear because one of them had hidden a last bottle and thrown it at us.
Sel got a piece of glass in the eye.
While he was being healed, we talked with the members of PKN about their very criticised victory in UMK.
~Rethnas~ - Are you conscious that you won only because of sympathy votes?
Pertti Kurikka - No. It's because people liked our song.
~Rethnas~ - But it's impossible! How can people like a punk song that lasts 1 minute and a half?
Pertti Kurikka - We're in Finland. Our music industry is based on monsters singing hard rock and folkloric acapella groups.
Effectively Finland is unique.
Pertti Kurikka - And please, with a crap pseudo opera dance and a boys band for not pubescent yet teenage girls as principal opponents, it was not hard to guess who would win!
Jess - You will not make many friends with that sentence.
Pertti Kurikka - I'm ready to fight. I have my nokias, I guarantee it will hurt more than a bottle of vodka.
Sel - Don't try please.
Asi - We don't have time anyway I guess. What is our next destination?
Daniela - Moldavia.
Laimis - Daniela? What are you doing here? We threw you on a road in Estonia.
She had no time to answer.
George and
Apostolis tied her up, put her in a huge plastic bad and threw her in the sea. Starting to wonder if we weren't damned, we left the place and prepared to leave this country. We crossed again the gulf of Finland and, surprising, arrived in Tallinn. Knowing it would be the last time,
Rick said he wanted to stay in his country for a little moment. We understood, except
nick who thought Europe was a whole state, and agreed, knowing that when we are in Germany it will be a huge mess because every person will ask to stay in his own city, and we clearly don't have time to stay one week in Cologne and two in Oberhausen.
Ah! Oberhausen! They have one of the biggest malls of their country but they do shopping in The Netherlands because it's cheaper!
When
Rick finished taking (black and white) pictures of Tallinn, he sadly joined us in the bus.
Eke complained because he was not as demanding as
Rick. We were expecting a fight but the only thing they did was replying to each other with deep sentences about death and the uselessness of life.
Except the two depressives in the back of the bus, our trip was quite enjoyable, and Daniela was right, we were going to Moldova. After the Baltics and Belarus it was ok but it turned more complicated when we entered Ukraine. Even though it was the East of the country, it's common knowledge that in those times, the surest place of the country is Chernobyl. Still dangerous, it was quite spectacular because we were driving with on each sides some explosions, soldiers preparing to fight, mines, grenades, Ruslana on the road. RUSLANA ON THE ROAD!!!!
Braking just on time, we saw her, unhappy, coming inside the bus and shouting :
Ruslana - Now listen you Russian scums I will make you eat your eyes one by one and if you're stil alive... Oh it's you! What are you doing in Ukraine? Oh nevermind, I guess you just cross our big and beautiful nation to find another ESC participant. I am right? Anyway, I don't learn you anything, it's not a safe place here, and travellers are always in danger. Where are you going?
willsong - Moldova.
Ruslana - Moldova? Then avoid Transnistria, they still live in 1935 and believe that Stalin is alive. And of course, they are on Russia's side so it would be a pity if you made, you know, friends there?
@hvdstrcbcbr - I don't think it's on our road so no risks!
Ruslana - Believe me or not, is it a coincidence, but soon I'm going to Romania to be an interval act for their national selection. The Romanian head of delegation told me to make it soft, so it wont last more than one hour. Since we don't have anymore oil here, may I make a part of the trip with you?
@douzepointa - No no and no! We are here to be in peace and with all your dirty guns you will make our soul dirty!
Dimitris - You have guns?
Ruslana - Obviously!
Dimitris - It could be usefull, who knows! Be our guest!
Everybody looked at him. It's true that he took the decision alone, without couciling with the others.
Dimitris - So what? I make decisions here! I am the boss! And if you are not happy I'll ban you all! You are banned! And you! And you too!
Do I look like I'm kidding?
When
Dimitris finished his authority crisis that was credible for nobody, Ruslana sat in the bus next to Sam and told him to polish her AK-47. He fainted. Angry, she polished her guns herself, with the help of
Aliya, who surprisingly got along well with her.
We arrived a few times after in the capital city of Moldova, Chisinau. The national selection was over since a long time when we arrived at the hall where it took place, but there was still every element of the show, including Karizma and Katy Rain crying outside because they weren't selected, Kitty Brucknell who was trying to find another country to represent and Eduard Romanyuta, the winner, who was sweeping the stage.
Liev - Eduard? Why are you doing the homework?
Eduard Romanyuta - Moldova has no money to hire a staff, so I do it.
Ruslana - Hey Eduard! What are ou doing so far from our good old but gold Ukraine? Don't tell me that you betrayed us hahaha! No I'm kidding! Nobody would try to represent another country just because Ukraine doesn't participate right?
Eduard Romanyuta - Uh yeah sure...
Is there any medicine for snoring people? lolol
It's fine either way 
